Getting the spark back in your relationship takes work, but it’s worth it.
Even the most loving and committed couples can lose that chemistry or “spark” that makes their connection feel so special.
Signs that the spark is gone include no interest in spending time together, minimal to nonexistent communication, getting annoyed with each other easily, and a lack of sexual intimacy.
1. Spend Quality Time Together
The initial excitement and passion of a relationship can wane over time. This is a natural progression in many relationships, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be rekindled.
Spending quality time together helps to keep the spark alive. It also shows your partner that you care about them. People whose love language is quality time often feel hurt by postponed or canceled plans.
Try planning something fun and exciting together. This could be a new restaurant, a bike ride, or even just spending a few hours at home doing something you both enjoy. Just remember to also have your own life – travel, practice your hobby, work on your career, focus on your fitness goals – it’s important to have balance in a relationship.
2. Communicate
Sometimes it’s easy to let your relationship slip into a comfortable routine. But rekindling that spark of romance and falling in love again is possible, especially if you both want to make it a priority.
Make sure to talk openly and honestly with your partner about how you’re feeling, and what changes you’d like to see. Reminding each other how much you care about each other can help bring back that magic.
Also, try to add some surprises to your relationship. This can be as simple as watching a funny movie together or sending your partner memes that remind them of you. Laughing and teasing each other can bring back that sense of connection and excitement. Lastly, don’t forget to enjoy your own life and make time for friends and hobbies.
3. Build Physical Intimacy
Even in a long-term relationship, couples can lose that spark. Sometimes it’s the result of long distances, contradicting schedules, or growing resentment. But, in other cases, it can simply be a sign that the romance isn’t there anymore.
Building physical intimacy can help to get the spark back in your relationship. This doesn’t necessarily mean sex, but instead, things like kissing, cuddling, holding hands, and hugs. Physical touch releases oxytocin, which helps to reduce stress and promote bonding.
Additionally, try to make a point of taking some time off from technology. This can be difficult, but it’s important to remember that you both have a life outside of your relationship. Spend time with friends and family, travel, practice your hobbies, learn a new skill – whatever makes you happy.
4. Enjoy Your Own Life
When you’re in a relationship, it can be easy to lose sight of your own interests and passions. This can lead to resentment and lack of romance in your relationship.
Practicing self care and having other social connections can help keep the spark alive. You may even find that it helps you appreciate your partner more.
Keeping the fire burning is no easy feat, but it’s worth it for the health and happiness of your relationship. Relationships, like bonfires, require time and attention to thrive. If the flame starts to die down, these experts offer tips for reigniting the spark. You may have to try something new or take a few risks in order to get the spark back. Trying to keep things interesting will also be a big help.
5. Appreciate Your Partner
It’s easy to take for granted the little things your partner does every day that make your life better, like getting the coffee going in the morning, putting gas in the car when they know you’re running low, or kissing you goodnight. By noticing these small acts of kindness and telling them how much you appreciate them, they will feel loved and wanted.
Appreciating your partner also means giving them space to have their own life and priorities. Allow them to hang out with their friends, travel, practice their hobbies, work on career goals and fitness, or whatever else makes them happy. Taking a break allows them to come back feeling refreshed. Hold space for their negative emotions, like frustration, annoyance and anger. They are just as valid as any other feelings.